By Ann von Dehsen, February 6, 2020 — Lately, I’ve been singing the song “Have a Little Faith in Me” to myself, because lately, it seems I don’t have a lot of faith in myself!! I leave my house and wonder if I’ve left a burner on, or the space heater or curling iron plugged in. Sometimes I even go back and check, yet so far, I’ve been proven innocent.
In my mother’s later years and after her Alzheimer’s diagnosis, she would constantly rummage in her purse for her keys as I was driving. She’d find them, and start rummaging in her purse again not 5 minutes later. I’d often say to her, “Mom! Your keys are not going to jump out of your purse and walk away!” Yet I find myself doing the exact same thing while thinking, “Oh no, what happens if I lost my keys, or phone, etc.?”
But, truth be told, I actually lost or forgot things more when I was in my thirties, forties, and fifties. When I was teaching full time, I’d be carrying lots of books and bags into school and I often locked my keys in the car. In fact, this happened so frequently that the AAA man who always came to my aid took me out for coffee following one of his rescues. Back then I just contributed it to being busy and having a lot of it on my mind. But now when I forget something or do something stupid I think it’s the start of dementia and wonder when and why I changed my thinking. Subconsciously society plays a role — now if we forget something we often say, “Well, she is getting older.”
Similarly, when we go to the doctors we are now asked, “Are you afraid of falling?” The first time I heard that I said, “No, should I be?”
So my point is yes, we are aging and things are changing but I don’t want to give up on the abilities that I still possess…hence the song, “Have a Little Faith in Me.”