By Ann von Dehsen, August 8, 2019 — In the spring of 1983 I had a 3-year-old daughter and was very pregnant with my second baby. One Saturday eve, my husband and I were supposed to go to dinner with some of his family members. However that morning our regular babysitter called to say she was sick and had to cancel. I tried a few other teenage babysitters that we had used but none of them were available. When my husband called his mother to tell her we could not make it, she recommended her friend’s granddaughter, whom we had never met. I was hesitant but my mother-in-law assured me that she was a very sweet girl who did a lot of babysitting in her neighborhood. Her name was Mary, and she arrived a little before my daughter Kerry’s bedtime. She did seem sweet as she read Kerry a bedtime story. Still, I was not completely at ease as we left, telling her we would be home around midnight.
For some now-forgotten reason, the dinner ended early and we on our way home a little after 10. As we turned down our street my stomach dropped at the sight of several cars parked on the street and in our driveway. Running into our house, we were greeted by the smell of beer in a smoky room and “Mary the sweet babysitter” looking stunned in the corner. There seemed to be people all over—mostly boys— slowly coming into the living room as they realized they were busted! My husband yelled “Nobody move, nobody leave, I’m calling the police!” as I ran to Kerry’s room. She was sleeping calmly as I covered her with kisses of relief. She woke up briefly with a little smile & gave me a sleepy hug. Filled with immense relief that my baby was fine, I felt pregnancy hormones, maternal instincts, and Mama Lion rage overcome and fill my body with fury as I returned to the living room. I grabbed our sweet Mary by her collar, pressing my pregnant belly into her and screamed in her face, “How could you do this? You put my child at risk! You disrespected me — I never want to see your face again.” I then noticed one of the very large boys smirking at me so I turned to him, looked up, and continued my tirade — “You think this is funny?” Then I looked around at the now quiet group & realized everyone seemed afraid of the crazy woman with the big belly— even my husband — Even I was a bit afraid of me!
As I finally began to come down, the cops arrived. It was not a good sign that they knew many of our uninvited guests saying things like, “Oh no, you again?” or “Mike, are you ever going to stay out of trouble?” The cops told my husband to go through our trash for any signs of drug use. Luckily we found none. Eventually, we let them leave but told Mary she would have to call her parents to come get her, which they did, very tearfully and apologetically. As she left, Mary finally said, “I’m sorry.”
A few months later, I went to visit a friend in the hospital and who was behind the desk working as a candy striper but our friend Mary. When she saw me, she immediately ran the other way. As I was coming back to the desk after my visit I thought it was a good sign that she was now volunteering and decided to say hello and tell her I wished her only good things now. However, there was no sight of her and when I asked the woman where Mary was, she said “Oh she had to leave unexpectantly.” Guess I’ll never know for sure if I was the reason why.
