By Ann Von Dehsen, Februrary 20, 2020 — This is the story of Toby, a beagle-pug mix who was adopted by my daughter Kerry from Morris Animal Refuge in 2009. It soon became apparent that Toby enjoyed attention and affection from females only when we were sitting on the grass in Rittenhouse Square. While tail wagging at the women who approached him, he quickly ran behind Kerry and started shaking when a man approached in the same way. Obviously, two-year-old Toby’s interactions with men had been less than kind. Around this time, Kerry started dating Gabe. Eventually, Gabe became the first man that Toby wagged his tail for. Being a believer in doggie instinct, I took this as a positive recommendation and was quite happy when Gabe & Kerry became engaged. As time went on, I began to think of Toby as Buddha-Dog. He had a calm nature, happy to sit up straight, slowly moving his head back & forth as he observed his environment. If you started petting him he would slowly lean into you as if he was returning the affection.
Then, my grandson Max arrived and suddenly Toby went down a rung or two on the family ladder. Taking it all in stride, Toby gently sniffed the tiny human who now occupied his former place on the couch. Soon, he’d sleep beside Max on the couch & the floor. Then as Max gained mobility & began crawling over, beside & next to Toby, he would calmly wag his tail. As years passed & Max gave Toby full body hugs & began to pretend Toby was a pony instead of a dog, Buddha dog continued to take it in stride as dog & boy became best friends.
A few more years past & Toby, now 12 years old began to have health issues- the biggest of which was failing eyesight. But as usual, Toby soldiered on & figured out the routes from the living room to kitchen, dining room to stairs & front door to the corner hydrant. Max & I began playing “find me Toby” in which we would clap & yell “Find me Toby” until the dog happily sniffed his way to our feet receiving dog treats & hugs in returns.
In the past few months, Toby’s health deteriorated quickly & Kerry & Gabe tried to prepare Max for the inevitable. Casually, he would tell me, “Toby is going to die soon, and when he does I’m going to get a fish.
But, reality bites, and last Tuesday night Toby died at home as Gabe, the first man he ever trusted held him. Max found out the next day & apparently cried through bedtime. When I saw him the day after he was still sad but was resuming five-year-old activities. When I saw him yesterday he asked me if I’d like to meet his new fish, Circle. Life goes on, but I’m sure Max will always remember his first dog Toby with love.
